Thursday, March 19, 2009

Excellent Injury Thursday #3

It's been a long time since I started this series. This particular "excellent injury" really doesn't compare to this one or this one. At least the end result picture doesn't do it justice like the previous ones.

So anyway, we had our redneck caps on and were sporting our rebel flags. (not really) We were at the mud pit gettin' our jeeps dirtay.

That is totally me. Proof? You need proof? Well here I am conducting a little business after my last run.

I wasn't conducting business at all. I was trying to locate our buddy with the rope because the Oilybeauhunk was stuck. No way I was pulling him out! He's got a jeep too, and I had already been stuck...twice.

I located the puller-outer and we continued to get dirtay.

However, when the beer was gone day was done, we headed home for the arduous task of cleaning the dirtay vehicles.

We parked in the driveway and assessed our situation.


The Oilybeauhunk did the proper thing and gathered hoses, and scrub brushes and cleaning supplies. I did what every respectable redneck wannabe does and went in the house to don my bikini top and daisy dukes. (Isn't that how you are supposed to dress to wash a car?) I thought so.

So, we are hosing, and scrubbing and washing and hosing....(not that kind of hosing - not in the driveway anyway - unless it's dark out and the neighbors are asleep - note to self, check u-tube).

I saw a clump of mud on my windshield. At the top, in the middle, I couldn't quite reach it. What does a drunk redneck girl in a bikini top and daisy dukes do in that situation?

She climbs up on the wet and soapy hood of her jeep to get said clump of mud. Duh!

While I was up there on that wet and soapy hood of the jeep, some dudes drove by and waved. So I did what every redneck girl would do. I flashed my boobs waved back!...while kneeling on the hood, of the jeep, wet with soap.

So, yeah, I slipped RIGHT OFF, landed on the driveway directly on my kneecap and then fell over into the muddy yard. "I need the hose" I yelled. The Oilybeauhunk hadn't seen a thing (whew). He had the Zanester bring me the hose.

"Mom's in the dirt, Oilybeauhunk"


"What happened, Kaila?"

"Nothing, I just need the hose."

"Why are you in the mud? What the fuck happened to your knee?"


"Nevermind. You slid off the damn jeep didn't you."


"Go sit down, I think you are in shock."


Turns out, I was in shock. My knee hurt like hell, and I had to ice it down for eight hours. I limped for 4 days.

Here's a pretty lame picture from a couple days later...

Sorry I didn't get a better one, but the story should stand for itself. Do any of you have excellent injury stories? If so, you must share. I have plenty more.



Momo Fali said...

Ouch! That looks painful and sounds even worse!

I have more stories than you have room here. One of my nicknames is "Grace" in, NOT graceful.

for a different kind of girl said...

Nothing that could even compare, nor be as fun as how you acquired yours! Ha!

Miss Yvonne said...

You pulled off the redneck thing perfectly, except maybe next time instead of the bikini top go for a white tank top with no bra underneath.

As for my injury story...last weekend I was cleaning my closet and I had this huge iron candle holder thingy screwed into the ceiling because I had nowhere else to put it and I was using it to hang my clothes on and I hung so many on it it pulled out of the ceiling and fell on my head.

Anonymous said...

Damn that looks painful. I just checked the other two as well - even more ouch!

I have nothing that would compare with yours and certainly no photographic evidence. Rest assured, next time I attempt to maim myself I'll take pictures.

Sam said...

You mean you're supposed to wash your car in something other than a bikini top and short shorts? Fuck. What DO I wear? A suit and heels? The word verification for this comment is CRINGE. AWESOME.